Weddings are about the bride and groom.  Don’t make it about you.  Weddings are different and difficult for many reasons, and they are not trying to insult you by not inviting you.  If you’re not married, you’ll learn.

Friends are replaceable.  Family, is not.

If you lost a family member, you will never be able to fill that void.  All you can do it learn to ignore it and remember them.

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”

Proverbs 17:17

Do not unfriend people on facebook.  It’s true, and if you haven’t had it verified for you yet, just give it time.

1. You’re either going to run into that person in real life and it’s going to be awkward for at least one of you
2. They’re going to realize and do or say something negative towards you without you knowing
3. There will be a social obstacle, from your side or their side, that would have been avoided if you had just left them as your friend.

Sure, there are ways to avoid getting to the point of unfriending people.  One is just not to accept friend requests in the first place.  Let them sit in approval limbo forever.  Second is just to block them from your feed or viewing your feed.

10.  I learned a lot about php, mysql, SEO, html, java, web design, social networking, webtraffic, and a lot of other geeky stuff that’s come in handy in my job and in my personal life.  Sometimes, just doing things is the best learning tool.

9.  When my dad passed, a college friend of his emailed me and said he liked my dad and was sad to learn about his death.  This guy didn’t know me, and I didn’t know him, but I like to think we helped each other heal there too.  He probably felt like he got his message across and got to say good bye, and I got a picture of my dad that I didn’t have before.  Good stuff.

8.  Can you believe people have asked me to give stuff away on my blog?  Heck ya!  I love free stuff.  I love giving away free stuff even more!

7.  When Kallie and I got married, I started doing a genealogy of her family.  After one her relatives found my blog doing a search for “Sealock”, he found my site and we ended up matching our family trees together.  Fun!

6.  This has been a journal and diary for me in a lot of ways.  I’ve gotten lots of entertainment looking at past blog posts and not remember saying those things.  Dreams, rants, or even saying things that other people said is a lot of fun to revisit.

5.  Back in the fall of 2007, I got asked if I knew of a LEGO artist in Pittsburgh.  I said no, but asked if I could help for what they were looking for.  Long story short, I was asked to teach a after school program to some 20 elementary kids.  I’ve taught the 6 week sessions twice and I love it and am so grateful for that opportunity!

4.  When I first started blogging, there weren’t many people out there blogging about their personal lives.  As it caught on, pittsburgh area bloggers started networking with one another.  I certainly have not gotten as close as many of the others have gotten to each other, and that’s largely my own fault, but I still feel connected to them and have gone to some meet ups to socialize.  ONLINE FRIENDS TURNED 3D ZOMG.

3.  Separate from just seeing the history of my thoughts, just being able to express myself, or type out my ideas is therapeutic and calming.  As the blogging platform gets better, it becomes easier for me to type up ideas instead of mulling them over in my head or possibly forgetting them.  I’m able to create drafts, schedule posts, and it’s no longer a chore, but an outlet that I’m able to make work for me.

2.  I’ve lost contact with friends over the years.  Sometimes, those people find me again through my blog after not knowing how to get in contact with me.  Even people that I was only acquaintances with in the first place has stumbled upon my blog and sent me a message letting me know about the small world scenario.  It’s funny when it happens.

1.  You reading this.  Honestly, it’s nice to be able to share my thoughts openly, and then people know how or what I’m thinking and respond back.  It’s kind of like an open invitation to a conversation with me; something I’m not good at anyway.  I’m not afraid of people who know too much about me because they stalked me on my blog.  If that’s how they like to spend their time, who am I to judge?  It’s creating the real world connections that make this blog so fruitful, for me.

Growing up at my dad’s house, we had an above ground pool.  I think it was about 4 feet high and 24 feet wide.  We loved when the water got low, because that meant that  Jay Gillis was coming over with his water truck to fill it up.  He’d take the hose from his truck, hook it up to the rim of the pool at an angle, and flip the switch on his truck to send gallons of water rushing into the pool, enough to create a decent current for a whirl pool.  It was awesome.

Mr. Gillis was more than our water guy, he was sort of a family friend.  His daughter, Janna,  went to school with us at Bentleyville Wesleyan.  Jay was a quiet guy though, and I think that’s why I enjoyed him so much.  When he would deliver water for our cistern, he’d go sit on our porch or play with our dogs, and I’d go out and hang with him.  Sometimes, I’d take him something to drink.  I didn’t want him to be out there by himself.

Anyway, after my parents had split, and my brother had died, our church attendance was sporadic at best.  One summer day, we did go to church, and Jay was there.  When the pastor asked what good news anyone had to share with the congregation, Jay raised his hand and stood up.  He said that he had delivered water to us the day before, and it just brought him so much joy to see us kids playing and laughing.  I was so stunned to see the quiet guy I admired so much speaking up to everybody about us.

What’s so great about that memory is that we were able to bring him joy.  I know he’s still around, and we have a few degrees of separation socially, so he may stumble across this, but Mr. Gillis played a big role in the happiness and maturing of my childhood.  He was a man that I respected, appreciated, and enjoyed.

When a friend is mean, it’s so easy to be mean right back to them, or even stop talking to them.  When they’re depressing, it’s hard to enjoy being with them and they can ruin the experience for everyone around them.

I’ve told this story to only a few people.  You might be a little grossed out, but it’s pretty funny.

Sometime when I was in college, my cousin, Adam, invited me to take a trip to Cedar Point with a bunch of his friends.  We met up at like 6 am and drove out to the park.  I was just getting over a bit of a cold, but it wasn’t all that bad, just needed to blow my nose every few hours or so.  We got in line for the Mantis, which is one of the better rides in the park.  The line was unusually long, but it was definitely worth the wait.  If you’re familiar with the ride, it does this fantastic set of 3 inverted loops for the finale.  The G force is so intense and that fact that you’re standing up makes it completely different from anything you’ve felt before.

What made this ride so memorable was what happened during those loops.  Standing in line for so long, sniffing my snot, didn’t seem like that much of a worry.  As soon as I hit those loops though, my nasal passages had nothing of a fight against gravity.  Snot went everywhere.  It was along the sides of my face, on my shoulder, and by the screams of “EWWWWWW!!!” behind me (I was in the front), I’m pretty sure some people got a present as well.  The fortunate thing (for me, at least) is that you do those loops on top of a body of water, so it’s not uncommon to get hit with some moisture.  I don’t think anyone knew what happened, until I told Adam, much much later.

It’s been a while since I posted a personal update.  Things in married life go well.  New job goes well.  Thinking about going back to school in the fall.  That might be the level of detail you get in the updates going forward…not really sure.  I don’t really want to write about my life with Kallie without her involvement.  What you might see this category turn into would be a opening of the way I think or the way I act, or who I am despite my surroundings.  We’ll see how that works.

One thing that bothers me sometimes is that Kallie will get bunches of people reply to facebook status updates for her.  Sometimes, it’s people that she’s connected through me, but I don’t even talk to on facebook.  It’s not that I want the attention, it’s that I don’t understand why people are compelled to post to her messages in such volumes and so quickly too.  It lead me to believe it’s her.  Some how, people are connecting with her through her update.  She’s reaching them in a way that I’m not.

So we give science a try.  I put the blinking cursor in my status update field and told Kallie to post something as me.  Post something that she would say, if she were me in that moment.  She wasn’t allowed to reveal it was her.  We’d test if it was the content of the status updates or Kallie’s "aura" that people were drawn to.  Within seconds, we had a reply to "mmm, my house smells like freshly baked bread.  I love my wife."  Then another.  Then another from a person I barely know.  I think we found our answer.

It’s me.  I don’t know how to connect with people, or I don’t give them a clear path to understanding me to be more precise.  I wrap things in metaphor, vague allusions, or esoteric references.  Recently, my mom replied to one of my facebook status updates saying she didn’t understand my messages, and she wanted to know if it was her or even her age.  I’m fairly certain it’s actually me.  With this post though, perhaps I can shed some light on to how my mind works and even give some examples to help you better understand what I mean when I say or do something.

We’ll take it back to the days when I first started to post away messages on AIM.  I constantly got asked what they meant.  Well, I’ll tell you now and perhaps it will help you to predict my behavior.

Most of my messages were drawn from lyrics –

"I dream that she aims to be the bloom upon my misery." – This comes from a Soul Coughing song called "I Miss the Girl".  That’s basically what I was saying.

"I feel as if i’m looking at the world from the bottom of a well." – This comes from a Mike Doughty song.  It just meant that I was sad, or I felt trapped, away from the world.

"Getting lost in the fall, glimmer, sparkle, and fade." – This came from Everclear’s album, Sparkle and Fade.   I thought it was a pretty sentiment to describe moods where I felt like a life of a star; people were lucky to catch a glimpse of a falling star, marveled at it’s glimmer and sparkle, and then it fades away.  I used it to express that I had just done something I enjoyed but probably won’t do again.

  "True dreams of Wichita." – More Soul Coughing.  Meant I wanted to travel or that I had a weird dream.

"I’ll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistake." – lines that follow "can I lay in your bed all day?" by Fallout Boy.  Usually meant I liked a new girl.

"Need more friends with wings, all the angels I know put concrete in my veins." – Billy Talent lyrics.  Means I missed people or felt crappy without friends.

"Looking at the man in the mirror and telling him to change his ways." – Michael Jackson, but taken quite literally when used.

"the world through a windshield is callous and cheap.  i toss and i turn but i can’t get to sleep.  counting the hours the days that turn into weeks" – The New Amsterdams lyrics.  Usually meant that I felt like I was just waiting for life to happen.

"Some times, it causes me to tremble."  – My favorite hymn, "Were You There?".  Usually an Easter away message.

"I’m shoulder high in crap and my water wings are flat." – President of the United States of America lyrics.  Usually meant I was stressed about something.

"I remind myself of some body else’s song." – Lifehouse lyrics.  Tongue and cheek mostly.

"Awake and dreaming." – Finger Eleven lyrics.  I was being reflective.

"This is the part where we start to feel better." – Gratitude lyrics.  something was making me sad.

A lot of my messages were my own creation –

"I’m allergic to the sun.  It makes my skin change color."  – This message was usually used when I didn’t want to go outside.

"I’m a pretty shallow guy deep down."  - It’s true.

"Warning:  This aoler may be potentially unstable.  Proceed to message with caution." – I was probably livid about something.  "Livid" was also used as an away message.

"projectiling a bee of fris across a botanical plane in attempts to approach and ultimately arrive at the X axis’ limits, while not offending the Y axis’ limits, at which point those efforts are reciprocated by an opposing force." –   I was playing ultimate frisbee.

"Let’s go get stoned.  Just like how they did in the Bible." – Just thought it was funny.

Some were direct quotes from movies or literature–

"The moments we shared are lost in time, like tears in a rain storm."  -This comes from the movie "Blade Runner".  I found it profound and quite beautiful.  It’s deep, thinking that there’s no use to cry when it’s raining.

"Closing my eyes and opening my mind in the clarity of passion."  – I’m not certain which source this came from, but it may have been from the movie "Atonement".  I usually used this one when I was falling asleep content to ponder life’s questions.

"Cheyne Stoking." – This comes from an excellent movie called "Dead Man Shoes".  At one point in the movie, the main character paints those words on an apartment wall of some "bad guys" while they’re not there.  It’s a medical term to describe periods of irregular breathing; most commonly the last grasps for breath.  I liked the phrase, so i put it up.  Possibly meant that I thought I was going to die sometime/eventually/inevitably.

"In the room the women come and go talking of Michelangelo." – This is from T.S. Elliot’s poem, The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.  I just used it to say I was talking to my smart wiminz.  Another away message I used, partly inspired from Keren’s song and the poem, was "Measuring out my life with a coffee spoon."

When I’m with you, %n, we stay up all night, and when you’re gone, I can’t get to sleep.  Thank God for these insomnias, and the differences between them."  – Remember, %n was replaced with the viewer’s screen name.  That was fun.  Anyway, I saw a performance at Heinz Hall of the Pittsburgh Symphony, and in between pieces, they would have readings and this was one of them.  I have no idea of the origin, and can’t seem to find anything through google.  It means I was in love or at least infatuated.

"James 4:8 " – The verse is "Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded."  This was my personal motto.  Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.  Life is that simple.  When I was searching for why I felt so disconnected from Christ, I simply have to [go to church, volunteer, call a friend to talk, pray] etc.  I needed this scripture during that time of my life.

"Super perfundo on the early eve of your day." – This comes from my favorite movie, Waking Life.  It’s a phrase that one of the characters has said to him in one of his dreams, but even he doesn’t know what it means.  It’s basically used as just a greeting/farewell.

"Perhaps I am a man of exceptional moods.  I do not know how far my experience is common.  At times I suffer from the strangest sense of detachment from myself and the world about me; I seem to watch it all from the outside, from somewhere inconceivably remote, out of time, out of space, out of the stress and tragedy of it all.  – H. G. Wells" – Pretty much the only good line from War of the Worlds.  I resonated with this deeply.

The rest were either weird, boring, or a mix of the above categories –

"He’s a maniac, maniac, on the floor, and he’s cleaning like he’s never cleaned before." – This meant I was cleaning.  Taken from the Flash Dance theme song.

"This away message is fleeting human contact.  both of us lost, but for a moment we’re lost together.  I wonder who you are." – I believe this to be an internet meme, but I can’t nail the true source.  It may have been that simply substituted "away message" in for grafitti.  see XKCD.

"Falto Algo." – Spanish for "Something is missing".  My boss used to say this. 

"Over the river and through the woods, to grandmother’s house I go." – I was visiting my grandmother.

"Home again, home again, jiggity jig." – I went home.

Ofcourse, there are the ones that meant I was sleeping…

"Dead.  At least to the untrained eye."

"Sleep with all the lights on." – Dashboard Confessional lyrics.  Most appropriately used when sleeping during the day  ie: night shift.

"some where between the sacred silence and sleep." – System of a Down lyrics.  Usually meant it was really late and I was still up for some reason.

"Under the Tahitian moon." – Porno for Pyros lyrics. 

"Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan" (SLEEP)" – own of my originals.  Paired with:

"Stress Induced Narcoleptic Seizures (S.I.N.S.)" – another original that I still use.

So, I hope this provides you with a little bit of a road map on being able to predict what I may be trying to convey in my own mysterious way.  Default to it being lyrics for something.  Then think that I just saw/read something that imbued me.  I’m not all that hard to figure out or predict.  I think.  Did this help?

This isn’t a How-To jailbreak your iphone.  It’s just some top reasons to jailbreak your iphone, based on my personal experience.  There are a lot of jailbr0ken apps that are used far more than any that I will list, but they’re the reasons why I’m jailbroken. 

Right now I’m on 3.1.2 on my iphone 3G.  Version 3.0 addressed a lot of what OS 2.x lacked, things like landscape keyboard, video recording (on the 3GS), MMS, and copy & paste, and a few others.  There are still a bunch of things that 3.x doesn’t do that the jailbreak community has enabled (reply to SMS messages without leaving your app, tethering, turn by turn directions, google voice, etc). You might even say that the jailbreak community (Shout out to Saurik) even did it first.  It’s hard not to think that Apple wants to offer the features that people are drawn to jailbreak.

There’s a huge library on Cydia of cool apps, like a gameboy and NES emulator, putting your icons in categories/folders, creating blank icons for organizing, or icons that "spring" you to a certain app page.  You can do things like add people to a black list, record your calls, save youtube videos, basically, anything you can think of, someone probably feels the same way, only they have the ability to write an app for it.  If you fancy customization, jailbreaking is worth it.

10.  Unlocking – Don’t wan’t to be on AT&T?  That’s fine.  You can still use your iphone on another provider without the full functionality. 

9.  SSH – This stands for Secure Shell, which can cross the line into geekiness, but basically, you can use your iphone as a big old memory stick.  You are able to copy and manipulate any and all files on the phone.

8.  5 docked items – Why not?  I use my calendar, phone, email, text, and safari all pretty regularly.  Why should I be limited to 4?

7.  Cyntact / ContactFlow – Cyntact takes your existing contact list, and puts the person’s photo (if you have it stored) as an icon next to their name.  ContactFlow takes that one step further, and your contacts are actually stored in a "flipbook" style app, just like you do with albums.  These two apps are certainly dependent on a respectable collection of photos for your contacts, but with googlesync and any of the apps that will sync your contacts with the photos of your facebook friends, it makes it a very pretty addition.

6.  Weathericon – If the calendar icon updates to display the real date…why doesn’t the weather icon update?  Well, now it does.  No more waiting for the weather app to load.

5.  Multiicon Mover -This is one that I’m sure will be implemented in a later Apple firmware.  hold down an icon to get the icons to wiggle like normal, then just tap on the icons that you want to move.  Each tapped icon will then show a little check box letting you know they are selected.  Scroll the page you want them on and press the home button and they’ll all move there.  EASY.  Just as it should be.  No more trying to drag across 4 pages 1 icon at a time.  It’s so simple, it’s genius.

4.  Cycorder - I’ve been able to capture video on my iphone long before Apple released the 3GS, and I can still capture it on my 3G.  Why not use the hardware to it’s full capabilities?

3.  StatusNotifier / Intelliscreen – When you have new mail or a new text message, StatusNotifier will put an icon on your lockscreen or up in your statusbar.  Heck, it’ll throw the weather up there for you too if you like.  Intelliscreen takes it even further and creates all kinds of gagdets / widgets for email, stocks, notes, alerts all displayed on your lockscreen for easy reference without having to unlock and go through all the apps.

2.  SB Settings – A quick swipe of the status bar, and you’ll bring up this cute little menu screen that you can customize to have icons to quickly change brightness, airplane mode, process kill, reboot, and a whole bunch more.  SB Settings is one of the most used apps for anyone who jailbreaks.  You can also hide any icons with this (like stocks.  WTF looks at stocks on their iphone?).  SB Settings has a lot of uses and it’s pretty and convenient to boot.

1. Themes / Lockscreens / Fonts - Here we are.  Numero uno.  CUSTOMIZATION, PLEASE.  I don’t want a black background and boring or ugly icons.  There are THOUSANDS of themes to pick from, and a lot of tools to create your own.  It’s so much more aesthetically pleasing to have icons that look like they go together.  I chose ones that match my case; a light blue.  I don’t want a boring old swipe to unlock, I want a pac-man character that chases a ghost, or mock fingerprint scanner that looks legit.  Change the fonts around, and now you got something classy and fun.  No more instutionalized experiences!  

I think that’s it.  If you have any questions, I’m glad to help.  Here are some cool links to check out:

http://cydia.saurik.com/

http://blog.iphone-dev.org/

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jailbreak_%28iPhone_OS%29

www.engadgetmobile.com/category/os-x/