The English language is stupid.

It’s ludicrous.  Rules, then exceptions to those rules.  Logic, then words that defy that logic.  We’ve have this stupid language for centuries, and we just continue with the madness.  There is no end in sight.  Sometimes, I wonder if the AOLers and shorthand IMers are pure evil or truly revolutionary geniuses.

Related:  Gallagher’s bit on words (skip to 4:30 if you’re short on time and filled on humor)

Have you ever looked at states with straight border lines and wondered why they were straight and how true those straight lines were?  I have.  I want to play with those straight lines.

I want to buy property right on the line in one state, then buy the adjoining property in the other state and try to find a loop hole to join them together as part of 1 state.

If you get really creative, you can start to form letters out of the new properties, enough to spell something fun.  Eventually, they’d have to draw up a new map and include your “revisions” to state lines.  WIN.

oh, and have I ever told you about my idea to run a marathon through 4 states near the mason dixon line?  That’d be awesome.

If you’re doing are doing a great job, or are contributing positively more than others, you get the privilege of speaking bluntly and saying how it is.

Splitting the check evenly should only be attempted for socially close indivuals in numbers 4 or less.   It’s just a mess otherwise.  Someone is going to short change the group.  Someone is going to order more food than everyone else.  You’re going to come up short and 1 person is going to end up paying more than everyone else.  Just don’t do it.  Tell the host you need separate checks before you order.

I stumbled on Austin Kleon’s list here.  I’ll break down his list, and add in my own advice and support for each of them.  After all, all advice is autobiographical and all I’m doing is stealing like an artist.  A lot of these are already similar to a Hall’s Rule of Social Order, and some others will be soon.

1. Steal like an artist.

   It’s kind of the art of progress.  You pay tribute to the original idea or author of the work, in the form of imitation being the sincerest form of flattery, but then you also add your person style to it.  As in Ecclesiastes 1:9, there is nothing new, everything has already been done.  Maybe if theirs didn’t “take off” yours will.

2. Don’t wait until you know who you are to start making things.

   Sometimes, it’s the journey, not just the destination. Trying new things is how you get to learn about yourself. Look at Seuss’ green eggs and ham. He was so sure he knew himself, but really, he didn’t have a clue. Maybe a bad analogy, heck, all of these could be terrible interpretations of Austin’s list, but who cares? I’m doing something.

3. Write the book you want to read.

   I want to write books. At the moment, I don’t want to read any though, and I think that is what holds me back from making something.

4. Use your hands.

   Sometimes the digital world doesn’t cut it. Go meet people, shake some hands, feel mud, get dirty, experience life instead of just watching it on a screen.

5. Side projects and hobbies are important.

   TRUFE. projects and hobbies are so key to my mental health, it’s not even funny. I need to feel like I’m creating something, expressing myself, like I’m working towards something. Sometimes, it’s the waste of time that is the most important way to spend your time. It’s grounding to realize that you are in control of your time, and ultimately, you need to be happy, not just a to outside forces.

6. The Secret:  Do good work and put it where people can see it.

   Definitely a secret I’m guilty of exploiting. I’ll type up a good email, and send it off to someone to proof-read, just so they can see what I’m doing and how I take care of things. Part of it is ostentatious, but, really, it’s just giving people the opportunity to see truth and know you more.

7. Geography is no longer our master.

   I’ve worked on PHP code with friends from all over the world. I supported the computers of people in Europe from my phone in Pittsburgh. I know more people in Australia, a place I’ve never been, than people 1 block away from me.

8. Be nice.  The world is a small town.

   heh, alright, I’m not very good at this one. It’s still true though. Always be grateful for the things you learn and the people that teach you, because chances are, they still have something to teach you later on, or you’ll need to go back and ask them for a refresher course.

9. Be boring.  It’s the only way to get work done.

   Certainly easy to contradict #5 here. When all your friends go out every night, sure it’s fun, but at the end of the day, you haven’t done anything but hang out with your friends. Sometimes saving your money for investing in something tangible is the greater decision

10. Creativity is subtraction.

    Church. This is my biggest pet peeve with the advent of the youtube sensations. Adding in so many vocal effects, mastering, looping, video editing, all take away from the creativity put in creating the music. The sad thing is, people don’t care.

Avoid causing conflict when possible.  ie: once you master rule #3, don’t do the things that other people are going to hate you for.  For example, if you’re going to stop your car in the middle of the street to talk to your friend on the sidewalk, make sure there’s no one behind you.  The least you could do is pull over.

Do your best to avoid creating problems for yourself and your offspring.  IE: if you chose a name for them that is in any way entertaining, that’s setting them up to be taunted.  They’re name should be easy to pronounce correctly (phonetics works).  I knew someone named Parker Brothers, Chris Cross, and Secretia.  Those are not good names.

Although you have the right and freedom to express your ideas and ideals as you wish, you also need to respect the interpretation and misinterpretation of that from others.  IE:  You can name your kid after objects like “Blanket”, “Apple“, or even “Ocean”, but you’re going to seem a bit odd by social standards.

Related: http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/living/2010/09/29/am.spurlock.freakonomics.cnn?hpt=C2

There should always be a point or objective to arguing. Arguing for the sake of arguing or even pure self entitlement is just silly and possibly destructive. If you can’t offer a potential resolution on your own, or if you can’t think of something the other side can offer to resolve the conflict, then you’re not ready to begin the argument. You should be prepared to identify the problem and offer peace, otherwise, you’re just complaining.

Nothing is universal. What works for you may not work for others. What’s also important here is to remember to think objectively and inversely. ie: What does not work for you, may work for others. An example of this would be the modern social networking tools out there. Just because you don’t use RSS feeds, twitter, or even facebook, doesn’t mean that other people find them extremely efficient and useful. People’s values are different.