how often do you talk to people on the phone?  Answer the question for the people that are not physically close to you or that you don’t see in person regularly.  I’ve always had the desire to see people, but I’ve never really wanted to talk to people on the phone.  I just really dislike the phone.  When you do catch up with these people, how long do you normally talk?

Elevator rides are not social catalysts and therefor should not be used as social opportunities.

There are social norms to follow and you should make sure you’re prepared.

These are from “The Definitive book of body language” by Allan and Barbara Pease:

1. There will be no talking to anyone, including a person you know.
2. Avoid eye contact with others at all times.
3. Maintain a “poker face” — no emotion is permitted to be shown.
4. If you have a book or newspaper, pretend to be deeply engrossed in it.
5. In bigger crowds, no body movement is allowed.
6. You must watch the floor numbers change at all times.

Words are stupid.

Whatever happened to “sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me”?  Words are really tools of destruction by nature, even though they can be used to come off as temporary good, but if those words aren’t maintained, it’s really just a form of prolonged destruction.  Only once you’re objective will you be able to acknowledge how unbalanced our dependence on words is.

Example 1:  You tell someone, “You’re an idiot.”  5 seconds later, you say, “You’re not an idiot, you’re so smart.”  9 times out of 10, the person still thinks you called them an idiot, even though you used words to negate and then reverse the initial comment.

Words cannot undo the destructive nature of words.  Actions, however, can.  Hence, “Actions speak louder than words.”  By placing such strong emphasis on words, you’re setting yourself up for 1) destruction and 2)prolonged disappointment if you deny actions and maintain a focus on words.

Words are also free.  Hence, “Talk is cheap.”  People can lie because it takes little to no effort.  To actually carry out their words in actions though, takes conviction.

I was at work walking from my cube to the elevators and I passed 2 guys I know talking about eye doctors who wear glasses instead of contacts having no expertise to share with people who wear contacts.  As I passed them, directly on the other side of a cube wall next to them is a Blackberry support girl who was on the phone with a caller.  The girl and the 2 guys were no more than 3 feet away from each other, separated only by a 3 inch thick, 5 foot tall cube wall.  Right as I was even with the cube wall, the girl and one of the guys said “contacts” at the same time.  It was like the intersection of a sine and cosine wave.  2 completely different contexts and conversations intersecting in verbal harmony.

To top it off, as I’m writing that paragraph, my coworker came over and said “Sorry I’m late, I was talking to my contacts over in another department.”

People are quicker to judge the quiet.

It’s usually because they think they have all the information.  It’s not like personality is flowing out of a silent person.  There’s a lot of common misconceptions about quiet people though.  I don’t necessarily agree with this list, but it’s a start.

http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-misleading-assumptions-you-make-about-quiet-people/

I used “Meaningness” in a sentence yesterday, and the other person questioned the existence of that word. I faltered, thought about it, and we came to the conclusion that it was not a word, and that i should have just used “meaning.” Post-conversation thoughts made me think of why I used that word. I swear It’s in songs somewhere, but I can’t find any lyrics (that i know) through a google search. But i felt vindicated that my instincts were right, even though they were also second guessed. Further thoughts on the word though make me try to think of a time when  “meaningness” is necessary and not able to be replaced with “meaning.”   so meaningness is meaningless.