Top 10

Top 10 reasons I don’t like football

23 August, 2012 (12:00) | Top 10

  1. There’s no playing until the clock stops.  The clock at the end of the game just expires if the leader has possession, and I’ve seen games where there’s like 20 seconds left and all the players and coaches are already celebrating on the field.  It’s unsportsmanlike.
  2. There’s wasted real time.  Change your lines.  Get set up.  measure the ball distance.  Everyone get in a big pile.  Now everyone get up.  All that time adds up to really long boring games.
  3. There are too many people on the field and on teams.  Pretty much every other sport, an average fan would be able to rattle off close to all of the players on a team.  I don’t see the same thing with football teams.  There are just random people that are on the sidelines that never get playing time but are there anyway.
  4. A player’s role is too specialized.  No wonder there are too many people, there are so many different positions!  I look at people like Cordell Stewart, who played like 3 different positions, as an example of how much of a joke the value of different positions are.  Just have the same people on the field do different jobs.  I mean, the kicker barely does anything!
  5. It’s way too popular.  It’s basically a religion.  I don’t think it got popular because it’s good – I think it got popular because it was popular!  It just feeds itself.  peer pressure and all that.
  6. IT’S SO SLOW.  DO something!  I mean, I know the quoted speech about football being a game of inches, but man, why’d they make the field so big then?
  7. Why is everyone wearing tights?  I mean, for as much armor they put on their torso and head, you’d think they’d want something more on their legs.  Especially in a sport with a man nicknamed “the refrigerator”, putting him in tights just makes the sport look ridiculous.  It makes sumo wrestlers look beautiful.
  8. It’s boring.  There’s never an intense break away or way to turn everything around, or if there is, it’s short lived.  It’s all structured plays, carried out, reset, then try again.  The defense is always on the defense and they have to stay behind the line until someone says go, then MAYBE they’ll get touch the ball.  Think about it, the object of the defense is to STOP THE GAME.  BORING.
  9. The sport tries to compete against itself.  there was the whole NFL vs AFL thing in the mid 1900’s, but now there’s arena football trying to say it is a better sport since it addresses the shortfalls of regular football like a smaller field and blah blah blah.  What is the saturation point of football in this country?!?
  10. It’s called football.  Soccer had that name first.